Thomas DeMartini

Thomas DeMartini, born in Englewood, NJ, passed away in Hendersonville, NC on July 2, 2025, at age 82. He is survived by wife Jane, daughter Anne, son Travis, daughter-in-law Alicia, and beloved grandson Ryan. 

Tom served in the US Army from 1967-1969 and married Jane upon his return from Korea. The first in his family to go to college, he earned a Bachelor’s degree from Transylvania University, a Master’s of Social Work from Tulane University, and a Master’s of Hospital Administration from the University of Minnesota. 

He had a successful career, starting as a high school history teacher, becoming a social worker, and ending as a psychiatric hospital administrator. His professional accomplishments reflected the throughline of Tom’s life: acts of service. A friend described him as “such an example - of lifelong friendship, the importance of staying active, involvement with philanthropy, and hard work for others.” He volunteered as an EMT and firefighter for the Beaverdam VFD (the highlight of which was getting to drive the fire truck around the neighborhood with Santa in it!), traveled with Red Cross Disaster relief, worked for Habitat for Humanity, and was a long-time platelet donor.

His family members and friends were also beneficiaries of Tom’s service mindset. He was everyone’s on-call handyman and an excellent problem solver. He tended a giant garden and built cages for Jane’s blueberry bushes when the birds were eating them all. He patiently put up the holiday lights and tacky lit-up animals Anne loved, built a treehouse and decks with Travis, remodeled houses with friend Jim, and constructed accessibility aids for friends as they aged. He even had a list of house projects for his kids to complete to ensure he didn’t leave anything undone upon his death.

Tom enjoyed many hobbies. He was an accomplished wood-worker who was generous with gifts (a lot of cutting boards!), and participated in Apple Country Woodcrafters Christmas toy program. He loved fishing - in his kayak in New Smyrna Beach, Florida, on trips with his good friends to Charleston and Alaska, and particularly on the dock with his grandson. 

Tom was an athlete. He played football and was a cheerleader in college, participated in volleyball, softball, and racquetball in mid-life, and enjoyed kayaking, biking, and lifting weights until the very end. Though always physically active, he was also injury prone! He amputated his big toe mowing a neighbor’s grass, nearly cut his leg off felling trees, dislocated a shoulder water-skiing, and recently tore his Achilles playing pickleball (much to Jane’s annoyance).

Tom read a lot, mostly crime and detective stories. His favorites were Lee Child’s Reacher stories, John MacDonald’s Travis McGee (though a recent rereading made him wonder why he had liked those stories so much), and almost anything by James Patterson, Michael Connelly, Tony Hillerman, or David Baldacci.

Tom died as he lived: determined, stoic, and concerned about the impact on others. His mantra was “suck it up!” and his lasting advice was the importance of having the right tool for the job.

Tom’s family would like to thank the caring staff at Four Seasons Hospice for ensuring his last days were comfortable and peaceful. Elizabeth House was definitely the “right tool,” and we could not be more grateful. No services are planned. Memorial gifts may be made to Apple Country Woodcrafters Christmas Toy program via the Community Foundation of Henderson County: https://www.cfhcforever.org/. Select “Give Now” and under “Gift Preferences,” use the drop-down box to support Apple Country Woodcrafters (ACW) and type “Toy program” in the comments section. Or send a check made out to Apple Country Woodcrafters Toy Program, P.O. Box 1836, Hendersonville, NC 28793

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